I got a new credit card today. Well, technically, I got a new “company credit card” today. When the boss wasn’t around, I went ahead and called his credit card company and told them we had lost his company card and needed a new one. They asked me for all of the usual identifying information – social security number, mother’s maiden name, address, phone, account number, etc. – and of course, I gave the guy on the other end of the line all of that information. I then told him that I wanted to change the password question “because the last bookkeeper got fired, and we need to protect my boss’s identity.”
The guy at the credit card company didn’t even miss a beat – after all, companies get new bookkeepers all the time. “Which question would you like?” the guy asked me. “Do you want a question about your high school, pets, favorite cities…” and on and on and on.
“How about the question about pets,” I answered innocently.
“Okay. What is your pet’s name?” he asked.
I thought really quickly, then answered, “Moron.”
“Excuse me,” the guy on the phone said.
“My pet’s name is Moron,” I repeated sincerely. What I wanted to add was – “and Moron’s my boss” – but I managed to hold my tongue… barely. It was so hard.
“Okay. Moron it is,” the guy said in a serious tone while clicking away at the keys on the other end of the phone. “Anything else I can help you with?”
“Oh. I almost forgot,” I added. “Our office has moved. The address I gave you was for the old address. The new address and phone number is…” and then I gave him my home address and personal cell number.
Again, I heard clicking on the other end of the line as the poor dupe updated my boss’s “new information.” When he was done, he said, “You should get that credit card in the mail by…”, which turned out was today.
So, I swung by my house and checked the mail during lunch. The card was already there. So I went ahead and treated myself to lunch – on the boss, of course. After all, he doesn’t pay me nearly enough for all the excellent work I do for him. And since the boss never opens the mail – especially that particular credit card bill– what he doesn’t know what hurt him.
How to Prevent this Kind of Bookkeeper Theft:
You would not believe how incredibly frustrating it is to call into your credit card company and find out that all of your password information has been changed. Not only can your password info be changed, but some people even go so far as to change the “mother’s maiden name” question. Of course, the simplest way to stop this is to catch it early. You can do so by doing the following:
- Open your credit card statements, or check your transactions online regularly. If anything seems questionable – no matter how small or large – call the credit card company immediately and ask them how many cards they’ve sent out. You can also verify that your security information is still what you originally created.
- If they tell you your password information has changed, be sure to throw a high holy conniption fit and demand to speak to an account manager or “their boss.” Get this account closed immediately because whoever has your card can still make purchases even while you’re on the line. They will send you a new credit card with a new credit card number within a matter of days.
- Get copies of your three credit reports as soon as you possibly can because – quite frankly – if your private information has been changed, there’s nothing to keep them from signing up for more credit cards at vendors you may never even have heard of. But, the good news is that every single one of those stolen cards will show up on your credit reports!, but not always all three of the reports, which is why you should spend the extra money to access all three. (In fact, for $14.95 a month at Transunion, you can actually access those three reports and credit scores for free every month. It may be worth it if you ever find yourself a victim of identity fraud.)
- If a credit card company calls you and says there is questionable activity on your account, get online immediately and see what they are talking about. If they are contacting you, they are probably seeing something they’ve never seen on your account before. So even if you have your credit card on you, it never hurts to double check whatever charges they’re concerned about.
- And lastly, make sure you know where ALL cards are at all times. I once had a client who ordered a card for his wife – a card which never arrived. It turned out, someone stole it from his mailbox and was shopping with it in the next town and my client never knew. Luckily, I caught it with the very next credit card statement when I asked for receipts that matched the charges, and we realized immediately what had happened. So even though the thief had managed to steal more than $7,000 in 15 short days, my client was not liable for a penny, especially because he disputed the charges right away. (Which is another good reason to check those statements every month.)
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